Happy 250th, I Think
Happy 4th of July. America is celebrating her 250th birthday. Unfortunately, she’s led by a national embarrassment with a full diaper and an empty head.
No celebration at the National Mall. The police and National Guard are looking for and defending the pool from invisible Antifa agents. I dunno if you’ve heard but they can scuba dive in 30 inches of water invisibly. Not one MAGA sees the irony and idiocy of defending national monuments from their Anti-Fascist imaginary terrorists. Hey MAGA, anti Anti-Fascist is pro-fascism. That’s how double negatives work. They don’t teach that in home school but it’s true.
I guess you could celebrate at the national state fair or fair of states or whatever it’s called. There’s room. The crowds are so small it’s not even a group. It’s a gathering. There are more reporters from FOX news lying about the crowds than actual people in the crowd.
Ok, enough negativity. Let’s talk about the beauty of the World Cup. I’m loving it. Yes, there’s been horrible treatment of African fans, the Somali ref and the Iranian team, but that hasn’t destroyed the event. It’s a world party. MAGA and ICE can’t ruin it.
Scottish and Haitians partying in Boston. The Nordic fans rowing. The incredibly beautiful fans. The posts about the hunks playing. Messi. The upsets. The whole thing is fun. The best post I’ve seen is someone who said the World Cup is what the world would be like without politicians. I believe that; people just getting along and having crazy fun. I don’t know soccer, I’m learning as I watch. I still don’t understand what is “offsides” but I will say I see why it’s called “The Beautiful Game.” The footwork and teamwork are amazing. The penalty kicks, the tension, now it's win or go home. Just great. Watch a game, and you will get pulled in. You’ll join all of us in rooting for teams you couldn’t find on a map. BTW shout out to the African teams exceeding every racist opinion about why they shouldn’t be there. It sucks that the announcers talk about the African teams with such amazement. It’s like they’re children or weak or something. Just about every team has African players.
They’re good enough to be there.
It’s also fun to see what visitors do like about America. I’m pretty sure there’s no Buc-ee’s in Norway.
So that’s it from me this month. Yes, gas and food prices are ridiculous, the Supreme Court is still horrible, and for some reason JD Vance is talking but I’m trying to take a break here and be positive. They say it’s good for me.
Tell you what, come to a show and I’ll rip on government and court idiots. We’ll all laugh and then we can get back to watching the World Cup and women from Cape Verde, yeah, I said it. Those women are incredible. Ladies, you can check out the Nigerian goalie. IYKYK.
July 10-11 Chinook Winds Casino in Lincoln City, Oregon https://www.chinookwindscasino.com/
July 24-25 The Grand Comedy Club in Escondido, CA https://www.grandcomedyclub.com/
July 30- Aug 1 The Punchline in Irvine Texas (that’s Dallas) https://www.punchlineirving.com/
Keep laughing!